H After many years as a Visiting Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara, I became a Project Scientist for a few years. My current title is “Academic Affiliate, Psychological & Brain Sciences, UCSB.” I guess no one should still get to call themselves a “visitor” after well over a decade. I came to UCSB in the summer of 2000 for what was supposed to be a one-year sabbatical, and never left.
I am a 60-something year old. I’m single, always have been, always will be. Using a term I coined, I’m “Single at Heart.” Single is how I live my best, most authentic, most meaningful life. My Single at Heart book will be published in the spring of 2023.
My true passion is for the practice and study of single life. For many years, before I turned to the study of single life, my expertise was in the psychology of deceiving and detecting deceit. I also write about how we live now.
To talk about singles or the psychology of deception, I’ve appeared on television shows such as the Today Show and the Nightly News on NBC, Good Morning America on ABC, CBS This Morning, CBS Sunday Morning, and the Early show, CNN Newstand and Anderson Cooper 360, PBS, Harball with Chris Matthews, the Discovery Channel, Lifetime, and the BBC. I’ve also appeared a number of times on NPR and many other radio shows. You can find more of my media appearances and mentions of my work on singles here, on how we live now here, and on deception here.
Links to my BOOKS are here.
I write often for publications beyond academic ones, such as the New York Times, the Washington Post, Atlantic magazine, Time, the Guardian, CNN and NBC. See my writings about single life here, about how we live now here, and about deception here.
Links to many of my articles and blog posts, organized by topic, can be found here.
I gave a TEDx talk in Belgium, “What no one ever told you about people who are single,” in March 2017. It has been viewed more than a million times.
If you are interested: A Personal History of My Passion for Single Life and Singles Advocacy
Here’s when I first started taking notes about single life: One Is a Whole Number
Some reflections on what I have and have not done and what I still want to do after 50 years of living single: It’s my Golden Anniversary!
Here’s something even more personal.
You can go to my CONTACT page to get in touch.
Want to read something about Bella DePaulo that wasn’t written by her?
‘I’m 63 and I’ve been single my whole life’
August 29, 2017
The new science of single people
New York Magazine
August 16, 2016
In T. Levine (Ed.), Encyclopedia of deception. (Vol. 4, pp. 285-287).
What if marriage is overrated?
New York Magazine
May 12, 2017
The price of being single: One researcher’s quest to end discrimination against single people
TED Ideas Blog
October 21, 2015
Prefer a podcast? Check out the ones at the bottom of this page.
Want some TV? Here I am on the Today Show.
Slide show? Here’s one put together by Lucy Meggeson for her “Spinsterhood Reimagined” podcast.