Praise for Single at Heart

“Bella DePaulo writes with characteristic panache and passion about the rewards of flying solo. I read Single at Heart—as I read her previous work—with delight and a frequent chuckle, at her wit, her good cheer, and her irrepressible joy in life and love. I took deep pleasure from her authoritative, no-nonsense reinforcement of what I already knew to be true in my heart: The essential role solitaries play in building and sustaining healthy, fully realized -communities. Brava!” —Fenton Johnson, author, At the Center of All Beauty:  Solitude and the Creative Life

“If you need a break from all the cultural chatter coming at you 24-7 insisting that you can’t really be happy if you’re single, Bella DePaulo’s new book Single at Heart is a must-read. In addition to Bella’s own story, it’s filled with the voices of real people from all over the world who are leading authentic, rewarding, joy-filled lives outside “the couple norm,” which is a term I didn’t realize I needed until I read this book. As a lifelong single person, I started out, pen in hand, ready to underline and highlight and put a ton of exclamation marks in the margins – and then very quickly I realized that I was going to have to underline the whole book.” —Gina Fattore, novelist and TV writer, author of The Spinster Diaries and writer-producer on Dawson’s Creek, Gilmore Girls, and Parenthood

“Single At Heart: The Power, Freedom and Heart-filling Joy of Single Life brilliantly outlines what it means to NOT look at singlehood as an unpleasant illness that you just need a good partner to cure you of. Through countless personal stories and sociological research gleaned over ten years, DePaulo has drawn the fullest and most accurate portrait of ME I have ever read. Though I’ve written in the single and childfree by choice space for much of my 48 years, I’ve struggled to ground my writing in more than just my personal experiences. Thanks to Single at Heart, I now have the data to back up what I’ve always experienced as an undervalued lifestyle choice tainted with social stigma by the coupled and the single alike. Single At Heart astutely details how those of us who choose not to give into the cultural conditioning that marriage is, by default, the best way to do adulthood are forced to climb over structural obstacles that many refuse to admit are unjust and inequitable. This is the book I’ve waited for since I was 19 years old and longed for someone to assure me I wasn’t abnormal for not seeing marriage as a prize and romantic partnership as nirvana.” –Keturah Kendrick, author of No Thanks: Black, Female, and Living in the Martyr-Free Zone 

“Masterfully dismantling age-old misconceptions about singlehood, Bella DePaulo reveals in this book the vibrant, authentic lives of those ‘single at heart.’ This book is a powerful reminder that living single isn’t a compromise for many people, but a profound, deeply fulfilling life path.” –Elyakim Kislev, author of Happy Singlehood: The Rising Acceptance and Celebration of Solo Living

“Bella DePaulo isn’t just a powerhouse, she’s a lighthouse. She reveals what the Couples Industrial Complex don’t want you to know. More power to her for chipping away at reductive and fundamentally baseless single stigmas. We need more luminaries like her.” —Catherine Gray, author of The Unexpected Joy of Being Single

“Bella DePaulo has unparalleled perspective and insight into singlehood. In this book, DePaulo compellingly shows what it means to be single at heart, bringing together years of research and personal experience. Single at Heart is for those who are single at heart—and for those who are not.” —Naomi Cahn, University of Virginia School of Law and author of Red Families V. Blue Families

“Single at Heart is the book society needs to finally stop believing that singlehood is a stop along the way to happiness. This book is so heartfelt and helpful—for everyone, regardless of their relationship status. It’s a compassionate book about how to find happiness within oneself.” –Ginny Hogan, author of I’m More Dateable than a Plate of Refried Beans

“Authors who question the marriage principle face the same question, even from sympathetic interviewers: aren’t there “hundreds of studies” proving that matrimony bolsters health and happiness? Not so much. Bella DePaulo has spent twenty years interrogating this claim — cutting through manipulated statistics and slipshod methodology like a hot knife through butter. She’s shown that marriage – and romantic coupling in general – offer no panaceas for health and contentment. DePaulo’s most personal monograph, Single at Heart continues her brilliant takedown of pop-psychology’s insistence on wedlock as a prophylactic against just about everything bad. This book goes deeper by exploring the benefits of living without a romantic partner as the epicenter of one’s life. Myriad men and women interviewed describe the benefits and pleasures: freedom to manage one’s time and finances; privacy; pursuing meaningful work; discarding convention in favor of a life based on conscious priorities; dedication to important causes; investment in community; commitment to “intentional” friendship networks that include cohabitation…the list goes on. Anyone who is immersed in the uncoupled life, who is somewhat single at heart, or who cares about someone single at heart must read this pathfinding book.” –Professor Jaclyn Geller, author of Moving Past Marriage: Why We Should Ditch Marital Privilege, End Relationship-Status Discrimination, and Embrace Nonmarital History