Dating, Moving In, And Losing Contact with Friends?

People who are married or in a romantic relationship name about 4 people (other than their partner) they can turn to in a severe crisis. Single people name about 6. Those were the results of a not-yet-published study (that I discussed here) that inspired headlines such as “Falling in love costs you friends.”


SWR Blog Crawl: Visioning a World without Singlism – Guest Post by Rachel Buddeberg

2010 Blog Crawl for National Unmarried and Single Americans Week

September 19-25, 2010

Bella’s Introduction

I’m delighted to have Rachel Buddeberg crawl over to All Things Single with this wonderfully thoughtful post. Readers of this blog and of Living Single know her well from her active participation in so many of our online discussions.  I interviewed her in her role as a single-minded change agent earlier in the year, and she also contributed the guest post, Are you sure you want to call that marriage a failure? Together, Rachel and I also put together that collection of quotes from several dozen scholars weighing in on the question of whether marriage should be a ticket to privilege. (Guess what our answer is!) Her blog is Rachel’s Musings.


Is the Socially Isolated American a Myth? So Many Important Responses

Recently at Psychology Today, I asked, “Are Americans becoming more and more isolated?” So many thoughtful comments were posted there and emailed to me that I thought I’d rewrite the post with those in mind. Instead, though, I’ll just summarize the original post briefly (you can read the whole thing here) so I can get to readers’ comments more quickly. I won’t get to all of the points (or at least not in this post), so let me thank JSS, Alan, UpperWorks, Anony-mouse, Psyngle, Lauri, Deb01, and everyone who emailed me for taking the time to share your observations.


Inventing Friendship: Guest Post by Claude Fischer

Bella’s Introduction:

Thanks to the work of the eminent sociologist, Professor Claude S. Fischer, I’ve known for a while that the 2006 media panic – about how Americans are supposedly growing increasingly isolated – was overwrought. When I saw a fellow Psychology Today blogger refer to the findings of that original study as uncontested truth, I knew it was time to give some attention to lots of other research suggesting a quite different conclusion. In preparing my piece, I contacted Claude Fischer (someone I’ve never met) and got a very gracious reply. Yesterday I published the post, Are Americans Becoming More and More Isolated? at Psych Today. I’ve gotten some feedback since then, from the comments section and by email, and will publish a revised version at this blog sometime soon.

While researching the piece on the myth of social isolation, I came across Professor Fischer’s blog for his new book, Made in America: A Social History of American Character and Culture. I especially loved his post, “Inventing Friendship.” He kindly agreed to let me cross-post it here.

I’ll have more to say about Professor Fischer and his Made in America book at the end of this post. For now, on to the heart of the matter.